Today's Change

     This is who I am...today. Do not be fooled; we are creations who change. Even now I drift from what I have been to what I will become. Though I am caught in a strong current, it is ever changing with me as I change. This is but a temporary house and place to stay for a night, or a year; but I will continue away from here eventually. At the end of this river is the place when the current ends and I can place my feet on solid ground. At the end of this journey is the place I can truly call home. At the end of this sojourn is the place of true peace and joy. There lies rest for the weary, love for the forgotten, and a home for the restless. This is but a lull in the current, and a pause in my thoughts. Come journey with me if but for a short time. We will teach each other of who we have been and we will become together.

School Confidence

    Milton once claimed "Confidence imparts a wondrous inspiration to its possessor.--It bears him on in security, either to meet no danger, or to find matter of glorious trial." Confidence here I remind you is not to be miss-defined as arrogance. Confidence is indeed something that must be built, and a long term project it is. I do not mean an empty hollow confidence which is merely a facade. I am referring to knowing that you can trust yourself, that in a tight situation you have the ability to overcome it, no matter what it may be.
    In my classes which started recently, I was quickly reminded of of how little true confidence there is in these students. They go about perfectly fine in their own small world with their own small friends. I'm talking about high school students who look well enough at a quick glance. Really, they are talking to each other and getting average grades and paying average attention to the teacher, but is that true confidence? I see a lack to critical thinking and logic. They are like walking computers programed with specific responses to specific questions so they can pass the standardized problems in life. Every once in a while I see one of them faced with and problem outside their small comfort zone, and just like a PC (sorry I couldn't resist my inner nerd) they crash. They crash back onto their parents or a teacher to bail them out and solve whatever it was. Now I'm not knocking reasonable help. God knows we need it from time to time and there are several students I've notice with good self-confidence.
    I was blessed with parents, and a father specifically who laid the foundations of analytical thinking and troubleshooting in me at a young age. He gave me problems to solve and taught me to think in a very real and applicable way. The experiences that he gave me, the experiences that he allowed me to acquire are an integral part of my self-confidence. Sure I failed, rather often. I made a fool out of my self once or twice, but less of a fool than the kid next to me, who didn't try at all, probably looks today. I am confident that I will fail sometimes. I am confident that even if I fail I will learn from my mistakes. I am confident that the reward is worth the risk.
    Dad here's to you. Thanks for all the experiences and pushes you gave me. I can figure out what's wrong with that engine and fix it, just as easily as I can talk to my state representative. I can design a small website, just as easily as I can write poetry. I can learn my way around a sound system from scratch, just as easily as I can cook a sage apple stir-fry from scratch. Because you taught me how to have confidence, I can do all these things and more. You showed me how to learn something I didn't know. Thank you.

Motherly Advice

    The well known President of the United States, Abraham Lincoln once said, "All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother." The less known President, John Quincy Adams, had stated earlier, "All that I am my mother made me." Now I'm not going to address how I believe that there should be a stronger fatherly influence especially in today's American culture where most children grow up without a father figure at all.
    I want to mention something I have noticed especially in the home-schooling (That is, the child's parents, mostly mothers, teach them at home or in small classes together with other home-schoolers. Usually based in Judeo-Christian morals and beliefs.) community near me. I'm certainly not sexist in the usual sense of the word. I do, however, believe that men and women have equal yet different roles. I see that the seventeen, eighteen, year old seniors are not what I would hope they would be. I would hope that I could say, 'Look at this next generation of men and women, they are ready to change the world.' instead I look and think to myself (for a large part), 'Another bunch of boys and girls, when will they grow up?' I observe that perhaps moms, you should let your kids grow up. If your son misplaced his cell phone, don't crawl around on your hands and knees looking for it while he just stands there. Mothers, maybe, your job isn't to take care of your children at this age. It might be to raise them up to be men and women. You might have to let them make some mistakes. Moms don't answer questions directed at your kids, if your "kids" are capable of doing so on their own.
    John Stuart Mill once said "Men are men before they are lawyers, or physicians, or merchants, or manufacturers; and if you make them capable and sensible men, they will make themselves capable and sensible lawyers or physicians." Mothers, love your sons, give them that advice about the weather and how he might need a jacket, but in the end try to raise them to be capable and sensible.
    I would like to praise all the mother's out there. The work you do to raise your children is incredibly difficult. I am not trying to belittle you or what you do, just suggesting a possible way to improve. My mother needed incredible patience and perseverance with me (can't you tell), so here's thanks to you mom.
    What do you most appreciate about your mother?

Meant for Many

See the place for many, when empty.
But slowly now it starts to fill,
and the noise it begins to rise.
Faces friendly and faces not
looking to and fro,
for their own small space in that place.

They gather here and there, I notice
with the him or her they most prefer.
And every now and then I spot,
a certain he or she,
who is by chance or purpose,
making their place with me.

www.mattspoems.com/home/meant-for-many

Regretful Opportunities

     One of the strongest feelings I have ever felt is regret. It eats at your soul, asking questions about what could have been. It hides in the past where you can't touch it, and attacks your mind in the present. I regret many things, both large and small, the many chances I missed and the many opportunities I saw and yet chose to ignore. I take the known path and it gives me security. It keeps me safe, in a way. I have often chosen to take the road more traveled and it has made life, predictable. Martin Luther King once said that "For truth and duty it is ever the fitting time; who waits until circumstances completely favor his undertaking, will never accomplish anything" I believe I am inclined to agree with him.
     While I was out of town this summer, I attended a two week conference. The seats were assigned and I sat next to a nice young lady for about eight hours a day, everyday for those two weeks. Now I did meet some amazing people though, if you ever met them, they will testify to the fact that I'm not the best at making friends. I regret, however, that I didn't get to know the young lady sitting next to me. I watched her, observed her if you will, but I didn't get to know her. I could tell you she was sweet and kind with a soft smile that made you want to smile with her. I could tell her handwriting out of a hundred others but I couldn't tell much about her, about the person. Opportunity, that is an understatement, all that time I spent so engaged in what I needed to hear and learn that I found a 'logical' reason for not making small talk. I used a good reason, a good objective as a mere shield to keep others at a distance. I missed the chance to get to known a unique individual because I had 'more important' things to do, or at least that's what I told myself. I always want the timing to be just right before I put myself out there. I always need to know the circumstances before I risk anything, even if the risk is almost nothing at all. I'm going to try to seize more opportunities when they come my way, even if they are not 'completely favoring my undertaking'. Will you?
     I would love to know what has happened to you because you didn't miss an opportunity? What chances have you taken that proved to be completely worth it in the end?

Believable Apologies

     A man named C. Simmons once claimed that "Accurate knowledge is the basis of correct opinions; the want of it makes the opinions of most people of little value." For the most part I can say that I agree with Mr. Simmons; however, I think that the opinions or rather I would say that the beliefs of people matter a great deal, to them.
     If people act based on what they value or on what they consider to be important, then it might be advantageous to learn how people determine value or worth. In order to find this I believe that the answer lies in the fundamental answers to life's most important questions, like 'who am I?' 'from where did I come?' 'is there a god?' 'what is right and wrong?'. The person, who believes that he (or she) is a massive collection of cells that evolved from some 'lower' life form, is going to value different things than the person who believes that they were uniquely created in the likeness of an infinite god. Just as someone who thinks that everything is merely a part of one large life force that cycles around, will behave differently than the person who says 'we are all gods you just have to get away from all the distractions to find your true god-self.'
     Now it's not like every time we do anything we say 'wait a minute...what do I believe about this?' No certainly not. If people's actions are based in beliefs, it would have to be, for the most part, subconscious. Now using this premise, essentially that 'ultimately people's actions are determined in large part by their fundamental beliefs or assumptions about the world', I am going to be writing on several areas of 'belief' having to do with those big life questions in some of my future blog posts.
    But right now I'm curious, just in general what do you value in life? What do you want to get out of life?

Post Script: I apologize for not having written in a while, I have been out of town for the past month or two.

Timely Questions

    "What is time?-The shadow on the dial, the striking of the clock, the running of the sand, day and night, summer an winter, months, years, centuries-these are but the arbitrary and outward signs-the measure of time, not time itself. Time is the life of the soul." Thus stated the great poet known to many simply by his last name, Longfellow.
    Indeed I believe that most people have asked that question at one point in their life or another. What is time? It should be among the great human inquires next to 'Who am I?' and 'Why am I here?'. If one approached me for the answer to that question I would likely stop, and think very intently for quite a while...and then I would say something similar to this, 'As a single piece of paper is to a book, so is each moment to that great concept called time. A piece of paper is (almost) two dimensional. If removed from a book it tells but a part of the story, explains only a portion of the equation, shows only half of the proverb. Books are three dimensional and they tell the complete story, explain the entire equation, and show the whole proverb. Each single moment which we are able to comprehend is composed of three dimensions. Time is that fourth dimension. Something must first exist, it must then have depth and height for it to be perceived, and finally time, so that the thing might grow, evolve, and affect other things. That is time.
    Somehow I don't feel that my answer is any any better than Longfellow's. In fact I would say my answer is slightly confusing. We could say "time is the life of the soul" and that's all very well and good; but then I would question "what is the life of the soul"? Could anyone answer that question rightly? Perhaps time is less something to be defined, and more something to be felt.
    So I ask...What is time to you?

Prepared Marriage

     Last week I read book titled, Letters to Philip. It was written by Charlie W. Shedd. It is a series of letters from a father who is a pastor and counselor on the topic of marriage and specifically on a man's role in it. Now I'm not married, so take my opinion as one who has no first hand experience with a wife. I enjoyed it so much that I read the entire book in two days. (not a spectacular feat in itself, the book isn't that large, but considering my schedule...) In fact I thought it was so insightful that I went and checked out the sister book of, Letters to Karen, written by the same man. I am now planning on going back and rereading the book slowly. Often, especially in the christian community, I think we don't properly prepare the next generation for marriage. It isn't a surprise to me when the divorce rate is higher than 50%. How many huge decisions will you make life near to the importance of finding a wife (or husband)? Career and college are the closest of which I can think. The book was less on finding a wife, though I have read several on that subject, and more on describing how to relate to your wife and common problems and solutions. Like I said I've never been married so my praise of the book is both untested and difficult to articulate. I found the 29 letters worth reading and I hope to one day discover if his ideas actually work.
     Were you well prepared for marriage? How do you plan on preparing your children for the big decision? Finally, if you are married, what do you love most about your spouse?

Friendly Proverbs Continued

This is a continuation of the list from my last post.
      A wise person...
Acknowledges God in all his ways
Honors God with what he has
Loves God's correction
Is happy when he finds wisdom
Doesn't keep good from those who deserve it
Is trustworthy
Doesn't strive with a man, unless he has a cause to do so
Stays away from whores
Gets out of bad contracts quickly
Is not lazy
Has or gives good council
Has common sense
Loves someone who rightly rebukes him
Receives instruction
Stores knowledge
Restrains his lips
Keeps peace with his neighbors
Doesn't betray confidences
Listens to advice
Talks only when it is right
Chooses his friends wisely
Listens to his parents
Walks with people who are wise
Runs away from someone when he finds they are a fool
Is not quick tempered
Merciful on the poor
Slow to wrath
Shares knowledge
Seeks knowledge
Makes his father happy (if possible and right)
Will be called prudent
Speaks wisdom
Develops a reputation for being wise
Is teachable
Has a calm spirit
Speaks cautiously
Is not led astray by alcohol
Sees when sin is coming and removes themselves from it
People in authority are drawn to him
Doesn't drink when he controls the fate of others

     During my study I found many repetitions which I did not include in my list. The most common description was in regards to what the "wise" man says. It would appear that what one says is very important in how one is perceived. I find several things interesting but I would like to say that I have no training in Hebrew nor am I a scholar of theology, so I leave myself open to correction.
     I noticed that it didn't say the wise man never got angry or wrathful, he is just slow to wrath and he doesn't strive with a man, without a cause. The wise man also must be quick to listen both to criticism and instruction. If someone, human or God Himself, corrects the man rightly or rebukes him correctly, it should cause him to love that person all the more. I will admit this last concept is one that I see rarely. In the future I will endeavor to  put this and all the other criteria into practice.
     Now that you have seen all this, do you consider yourself to be a 'wise' person? Are you becoming wiser and developing relationships with wise people?

Friendly Proverbs

     The well know passage from Proverbs seventeen begins something like this, "A friend loves at all times..." That seems like a fairly good description of a friend to me. Last year when I moved to a new state I decided that I would try to make the best friends I could, this seemed like a great plan but there was one problem. How do I know who would make a good friend? How do I know if they will 'love at all times'? Also in the book of Proverbs, It says that "Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm." I wish to become wise and I do not desire to suffer harm, my answer was simple, I will become friends with wise people. Again I found myself in a small conundrum. How do I know if a person is wise? It was at this point that I set out on a journey through (the book of) Proverbs making a list of what it directly says regarding the characteristics of a wise person. Here is the basic outline that I derived from my study.

A wise person...
Listens
Learns
Gets wise advice
Listens to his dad
Obeys his mother
Stays away from situations where others are sinning
Has discretion
Has understanding
Stays away from people who
...say perverse things
...rejoice in evil
...cheat
...flatter
Trusts the Lord
Doesn't trust his own knowledge

     This is the first part of my list and I would continue writing, but alas I must arise earlier than usual and, subsequently, need to get some rest before I do so. I will try to continue this shortly, (as opposed to finishing this longly).
     How do you and how did you choose your friends? Did you just happen upon them and fall into friendship? Did you specifically seek a few of them out and try to become friends? Lastly I would like to ask you a more personal question. Are you a good friend?

Speaking

     Yesterday evening, the local high school debate club put on a production entitled "Be the Music". The idea was Christians are supposed to be the music in the world like there is music in the background of a movie. Aside from needing someone to teach them how to hold a mic and a few other sound issues they did a good job. I knew the members who wrote the skits and some of the monologues, they have talent. I even turned my cell phone to silent before the performance, something which I only do once or twice a year. Those who can inspire and move others with nothing but words, have the potential to be even more destructive than an atomic bomb, or to usher in a new age of peace. God protect us from the first and send us the latter.
     I choose not to speak more often than I choose to speak. Most sayings of the wise, or those considered to be wise, urge the reader to be slow to speak. I am not the best conversationalist, for I often am too slow to speak. I would like to leave you with this thought for the speaker. A man named Alexander Gregg once said, "There are three things to aim at in public speaking; first to get into your subject, then to get your subject into yourself, and lastly, to get your subject into your hearers."
     For the readers who do not desire to stand before the multitudes, I would give this quote from Voltaire, "There is a wide difference between speaking to deceive, and being silent to be impenetrable."
     Do you speak sometimes, too quickly? Are you often too afraid to speak up? I would remind everyone that you don't have to deceive or be silent. There is a third option, to speak brave and boldly for that which you know to be true.

Conversational Realizations

     With whom do you talk? I speak with people that I desire to know or understand (often I am forced by necessity to converse in order to avoid appearing inconsiderate). I had a conversation today with a friend of someone with whom I speak. I came to the realization that the two minute dialogue was the longest I had spoken to her...ever. I stated to analyze the possible causes for this. First, I had never truly tried to converse with her. A rather unobjective decision on my part, for I find her 'humor' of extreme exaggeration coupled with sarcasm to be annoying. Second, I have never seen her with out at least one or two or her friends by her side. This passing today while I was working on something, was the first time I recall having the opportunity to speak with only her. Third, those afore mentioned friends talk more than she does, so in a conversation one doesn't talk to any single person but the collective. This would seem to be a common tend amongst groups of young ladies. I find she is much more interesting and not quite as 'humorous' when she is separated from the group, a fact which was quite intriguing to myself.
     Why do you speak to people? Who is someone that you see often and yet with whom you rarely speak? I will try to be more aware of the people and the conversations. I offer the same proposal to you, take notice first of your surroundings, second of the people therein, and last of the conversations that one finds hidden there.

Nonspatial Continuum and William Jennings Bryan

     Time. Webster currently defines time as "...a nonspatial continuum that is measured in terms of events which succeed one another from past through present to future". My schedule for the next several weeks is full of events succeeding one another very swiftly. I may not be able to properly maintain this blog during those periods of nonspatial continuum; however, I will do my best to provide y'all with interesting posts.
    William Jennings Bryan (1860–1925) died a few days after the famous scopes trial in Dayton TN. He never got to deliver his last speech, it was presented a few days later. I read part of this speech recently and found his reasonings and the conveyance of those ideas intriguing.
     "There is no more reason to believe that man descended from some inferior animal than there is to believe that a stately mansion has descended from a small cottage. Resemblances are not proof-they simply put us on inquiry. As one fact, such as the absence of the accused from the scene of the murder, outweighs all the resemblances that a thousand witnesses could swear to, so the inability of science to trace any one of the millions of species to another species, outweighs all the resemblances upon which evolutionists rely to establish man's blood relationship with the brutes. But while the wisest scientists cannot prove a pushing power, such as evolution is supposed to be, there is a lifting power that any child can understand. The plant life lifts the mineral up into a higher world, and the animal lifts the plant up into a world still higher. So, it has been reasoned my analogy, man rises not by a power within him, but only when drawn upward by a higher power. There is a spiritual gravitation that draws all souls toward heaven, just as surely as there is a physical force that draws all matter of the surface of the earth towards the earth's center. Christ is our drawing power; He said, 'I, if I be lifted up from the earth, will draw all men unto me,' and His promise is being fulfilled daily all over the world." -William Jennings Bryan
     What do you believe? How did man come into being? Did he evolve or was he created?

Short Post on Life

     Recently I was pondering what is the best way to measure life. Is life measurable? I don't mean years but, quality. It seems a lot of people think its all about what you did, what makes a great story. If you could judge life by the funny stories of stupid stuff you did, then I would measure rather low on life. I am rather cautious and can sometimes double and triple check whatever I'm doing. (Insert clever and intriguing quote about life here) Some people consider life is meaningless without a purpose or a 'higher' calling, and they measure life by what you have done in service to that god or gods. Even a few people think that life is nothing more than here and now, live it up before it's gone. Also I find that a persons view of life is greatly dependant of their view of heaven, hell, or some other afterlife.
     What do you believe? What is a good definition of life? How do you measure the quality of life? Do you think there is an afterlife of some kind?

History Notes?

     I just finished typing two full pages of notes for a friend who couldn't make it to the review in a class we both have. Now that's not to say hey look at me aren't I nice. On the contrary she (my friend) is certainly one of my favorite people. I'm not saying I'm in love with her but I do like her. I don't say that 'I like' anyone very easily or quickly but there are I would say about 4-5 people my age with whom I hang out that 'I like'. 
     Anyway... while I was taking the notes I thought about all the people in the class and determined for whom I would be willing to take notes. 'No not him, he is really lazy.' 'No not her, she always tries to use her good looks to get everything she wants.' and so forth, you get the idea. There are I would say at most two or three students whom I would help if they asked. I know they are diligent, intelligent, and kind, all qualities I hold in high regard. History notes are not a life and death situation and I feel that I have fair stipulations for giving my assistance. (Oh I just realized that another one of those people to whom I would send notes wasn't there either. I will send them a copy since I have it typed already.)
     Who do you help? How do you categorize the people in your life? Are you as reserved as I am with calling people 'my friend'?

Good Morning

     Over the past weekend several people have asked me "How are you doing?" and I have replied rather simply, "Normal." This, as I review it, probably sounded very rude to them. But I am caught between actually responding to them truthfully, which people usually don't want you to do, or almost lying by saying "fine", "good" or another common answer. I think I will try for the rest of the week to respond fully and truthfully to the generic "How are you doing?". I think that people who really care about me will appreciate my answer and people that really don't care will not ask me again. I will tell you how it goes. Do people really care 'how I am' or is it just a saying like hello that doesn't bear any feeling?
    I am drawn to remember Tolken's The Hobbit. In the very first chapter there is a conversation, which is partially related to this topic, when Gandalf comes to Bilbo and Bilbo says "Good Morning". If you haven't read The Hobbit then you should at least read that discourse near the beginning. I find it most refreshing and amusing.
     So I am left to ask you, how are you doing?

An Adult?

     I've been reading some Chinese philosophy lately (yes it is just for fun and I know I'm weird. note: for definition of weird please read older posts) Confucius said, "Let a man be stimulated by poetry, established by the rules of propriety, and perfected by music."
     I read allot of poetry, in fact I have an entire small bookcase dedicated to works of poetry. I even write poetry from time to time. I am also far more pertaining to the stricter rules of etiquette than most men I know and I always try to be as kind and polite as possible. Finally in the last stipulation, music. Classical music is my favorite genre of music followed closely by Celtic and I even can appreciate a little euro dance. So according to Confucius I am a man. Now I find these requirements to be lacking in several areas but for a short saying it's not half bad.
    I find that many of my teen friends are hmm... not quite as 'grown up' as they would have been if they were born a few centuries ago. How much does personal maturity and age determine if a person is an 'adult'? How much is it just a social standard that honestly has very little to do with actual capabilities? When should real adult responsibilities fall upon a person? These are questions I ponder. What do you think?

Original Poem

Here is an original poem of mine, hope you like.

Today I heard a flower,
and it whispered me, your name.
I couldn't resist so I picked it up
and now present it to you.

Today I heard a Rose
and it sounded like a heartbeat.
It reminded me of life
and so I brought it to you.

Today I heard a tulip
and it echoed of dancing.
It taught me to waltz
so here I give it to you.

Today I heard a lily
like a splash in still water.
It told me 'just jump in'
and thus I hand it to you.

Today I heard a flower
and it sounded of love.
I couldn't resist so I picked it up
and now I give it to you.

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License

Voices of Feeling

      "How often the spell of beauty is rudely broken by coarse, load talking! How often you are irresistibly drawn to a plain, unassuming woman, whose soft silvery tones render her positively attractive." -Lamb
     I did not realize until the other day how true this actually was. I have a friend who indeed has an amazing voice. She sings at my church and also DJs at a local radio station from time to time. I heard her on the air the other day and I can only describe it as "sounding like she was smiling". It was only the weather but it just sounded happy. Because I hear her so often, I have become able to distinguish her voice from others fairly easily and I will say that I have heard few things on the radio quite as enjoyable as that smiling voice.
     Can you tell if someone is happy just by the way their voice sounds? I know with some people I can...sometimes.

Wit or Wisdom

          "Be rather wise than witty, for much wit hath commonly much froth, and it is hard to jest and not sometimes jeer too, which many times sinks deeper than was intended or expected, and what was designed for mirth ends in sadness." stated a C. Trenchild once.
     This could have very well been the defining statement of a debate I had with my self several months ago. Let me tell you. I moved into a new area and was taking classes and making friends with new people. Most of the other students had known each other for about a decade before I arrived. There was an ongoing joke to call one of the girls fat and tell fat jokes about her. Now you see, she wasn't fat at all and apparently that is where most of the humor came from. I asked around and found out they had been doing this for several years with no great objection from the girl, yet I could not discover why it made me so uneasy, troubled, annoyed, and even a little angry. I determined that It was not a direct sin for them to joke like that and I figured that it was not causing me to sin so I didn't know what was so odd. I finally determined what it was, I didn't want to joke like that, and I didn't want to develop the habit of ignoring people who joke and jest like that. I told them so and they were quite kind in granting my personal request to stop. You see I believe that "it is hard to jest and not sometimes jeer too"
     So what do you think? Do people need to just lighten up? Or should we all pay more attention to what we say about other people? Is it hard to jest and not jeer too?

Melodious Flowers

     I had the chance today to watch a young lady I know skip around and pick flowers in a small field. She told me later that she had decided, she wouldn't mind picking flowers even though they die soon afterwords, because 'she would rather be picked and live for a day with someone then to never be picked and live a week alone.' I must admit that she seems to always be able to make me smile.
     This is the type of interesting sayings that she would like. H.W. Beecher said, "What a pity flowers can utter no sound?-A singing rose, a whispering violet, a murmuring honeysuckle,-oh, what a rare and exquisite miracle would these be!" I enjoy word pictures like these which, contrary to the common 'a picture speaks a thousand words' mentality, rouse the mind from slumber and awake the imagination to new heights that I believe a picture never could.
   So tell me, would you rather be picked and live with someone for a day, or would you rather live a week alone?

Quote

     Jobyna Ralston was an actress in the first half of the 20th century. She once claimed, "There are few things that never go our of style, and a feminine woman is one of them." That is a fairly bold statement, more so now then even then when it was originally said.
     My personality on the Myers-Briggs test is INTJ. Now, men of that personality tend to be rather unrestrained by traditional male/female roles, but this is not the case for me. I honestly find feminine women much more attractive than the feminist raised, yell at you if you open the door for them women that seem to be everywhere now 'n days. This doesn't mean that I hate ladies who wear jeans just that I think the dress or skirt looks better most of the time. I am finding, however, that more traditional women are becoming hard to find.
     So tell me, was Jobyna Ralston correct? Are feminine woman always in style or do them come in and out like wide and thin ties?

The Point

     Now that I have spent several posts telling you basically nothing about myself I have decided to just do a short post that honestly just has observations about myself, about you, and life in general. This is probably the format many of my posts will take. Tell me what you think.
     In most people's lives they come to a point when they realize that they are a man or a woman, that their childhood is gone, and that the point they thought would be so great is now upon them. It's when they begin to change from saying 'I can't wait until this or that' and they start to say 'I remember when I was...' This change can happen in a flash in a moment like a bolt of lightning or slowly over years. I remember I came upon this point earlier in life than most. It was when I began to know what I didn't know.
     I recently had someone ask me, 'so what problem in the world do you want to fix?' I had to really think about it. I know what I want to 'be when I grow up' but I hadn't thought of it in a fixing way. I'm still not sure how exactly to put into words my answer to that question. I want to teach so perhaps I would say that instead of fixing something I want to keep them from being broken.
What problem in the world do you want to fix?

Who am I? Part 3

     I am as unusual as normal and as normal as unusual. Normal should be the majority but the majority of people think of themselves as unusual is some way or another. Unusual would them seem to be the normal, but if that is true then both normal and unusual lose their meaning. So I claim that I am normally unusual and unusually normal. I am quick to think, slow to act. I can be perfectly composed one moment and flustered the next. I am the one who shows no feeling and yet is moved the most, capable of great love and greater apathy. I am the common man you will only meet once in a lifetime. I am the dancer with two left feet who somehow still keeps time. I am the musician with wrong notes that still sound right. I am the the actor with no drama who still brings life to the character. I am the new guy who has been here from the beginning. I am the philosopher of old, who is now. I am the teller of tales that you can't hear, the singer of songs with no words. I am your quiet friend who simply smiles at you.
How are you unusually normal?

Who am I? Part 2

     I am a student. I study to learn and therefore I must be a student of something. I enjoy learning, to be more precise, I enjoy learning what I want to learn. (we all have our limitations) I am a student of language, of history, of mathematics, of theater. Yes, but I learn so much more from life. I am the still observer. I am a student of life. I cannot only watch life, I can watch others live and others lives but I still must live and have a life. Many of the lessons we learn in life come the hard way through mistakes and errors. It has been argued that these are the best, the most profitable, methods of learning, not so for me. I am an observer. I watch thereby I learn. I seek truth and I search in life for truth. Truth comes in many shapes and sizes. Do not be fooled, truth is different from fact. Facts tell us something but truth teaches us. Fact may tell me that the girl sitting next to me is exactly five feet, five and a half inches tall or it might say something more humiliating, like humans still don't know what atoms look like. Truth might teach me that music is the universal language, or that love is something both simple and infinitely complex. I am a learner of facts. I am a student of truth.
Of whom are you a student?

Who am I?

     Who am I? I was born, and then I began the journey, the adventure, the great search, to find the answer to that question, "who am I?" Thus far I have found several answers. The first answer is, I am a christian. That is to say that I believe that a man, who was both God and human, named Jesus lived and claimed to be God. Jesus said that the only way to heaven was through him and he was killed for that statement. If I thought that the account ended there, then I would say he was probably crazy. I mean really a man who says he is God, that's ridiculous. But I believe that after being dead for three days this Jesus came back to life. It's because I believe he rose from the dead that I think he is God and all the things he said  were true and not delusional ramblings. And so I say I am a Christian and so I find part of "Who I am."
Who are you?