One of the strongest feelings I have ever felt is regret. It eats at your soul, asking questions about what could have been. It hides in the past where you can't touch it, and attacks your mind in the present. I regret many things, both large and small, the many chances I missed and the many opportunities I saw and yet chose to ignore. I take the known path and it gives me security. It keeps me safe, in a way. I have often chosen to take the road more traveled and it has made life, predictable. Martin Luther King once said that "For truth and duty it is ever the fitting time; who waits until circumstances completely favor his undertaking, will never accomplish anything" I believe I am inclined to agree with him.
While I was out of town this summer, I attended a two week conference. The seats were assigned and I sat next to a nice young lady for about eight hours a day, everyday for those two weeks. Now I did meet some amazing people though, if you ever met them, they will testify to the fact that I'm not the best at making friends. I regret, however, that I didn't get to know the young lady sitting next to me. I watched her, observed her if you will, but I didn't get to know her. I could tell you she was sweet and kind with a soft smile that made you want to smile with her. I could tell her handwriting out of a hundred others but I couldn't tell much about her, about the person. Opportunity, that is an understatement, all that time I spent so engaged in what I needed to hear and learn that I found a 'logical' reason for not making small talk. I used a good reason, a good objective as a mere shield to keep others at a distance. I missed the chance to get to known a unique individual because I had 'more important' things to do, or at least that's what I told myself. I always want the timing to be just right before I put myself out there. I always need to know the circumstances before I risk anything, even if the risk is almost nothing at all. I'm going to try to seize more opportunities when they come my way, even if they are not 'completely favoring my undertaking'. Will you?
I would love to know what has happened to you because you didn't miss an opportunity? What chances have you taken that proved to be completely worth it in the end?
Any time that we are obedient to God, it's "worth it in the end" no matter how we feel or what it look like at the moment. I have a perfect example. I at first turned down the opportunity given to me to become lead teacher in for my grade level, but I was convicted by the Holy Spirit for not praying about the situation first. SO, I had to look like an idiot and tell my assistant principal that I change my mind. I didn't want to do it at all. Who wants to be the one to be yelled at when your grade messes up or have more responsibility, NO ONE. I don't know why I am in this position, but I am sure if I allow God to work in me and continue to obey HIm, it WILL be worth every minute of it.
ReplyDeleteFunny- the experience that first came to mind for me was also about teaching. When I first began to teach worship dance, it was quite a step of faith, as I had only had a few years of dance training (far less than any of the other teachers) and nothing else to "go on" save love of God. He graciously provided me with help along the way, and it has been (and will be!) a glorious journey... teaching younger girls how to study the Bible, how to worship God with their whole being, and learning so much myself as I do it - that is irreplaceable!
ReplyDeleteI thought of the Casting Crowns song "Voice of Truth" as I was reading your post... "Oh what I would do to have/the kind of faith it takes...To step outside my comfort zone/into the realm of the unknown/where Jesus is...for [His] glory" Look it up if you don't know it; it's a great song!